Dear A$$hole,

I do not understand hot headed people. You know the kind who will pick up their cell and send nasty text messages on a whim while they are pissed off?  Or the ones who can fly off the handle with no warning whatsoever – you never see it coming like a blitz attack?  Or, my personal favorite, the guy who is really just a high maintenance chick on the rag with a penis – moody, bitchy and always ready to take something and turn it from an innocent comment into an attack only he can see?  Oh, and the one who is just itching to pick a fight and whining about how disrespected he is?  He gives you such hell that he can make even the most non-confrontational and even-tempered among us lose it.  And what is infinitely worse is that you find yourself sinking to their sad level and being roused into the futility of fighting back.  Then you inevitably get the apologetic “excuse my frustration this morning, but…” text later after things have blown over a bit?  Well, here’s a little something from me to that guy.  Call it a rant, call it advice, whatever you’d like, but here is a piece of my mind for free.

First of all, I will not excuse you. You are being an asshole and, since it is not a rare thing but a way of life for you, I will not excuse it. Don’t bother to apologize to make yourself feel better and try to gloss over the fact that you are an ass. Trust me, everyone already knows. And just maybe you should temper your reactions so you don’t do stupid things that you wind up apologizing for later.  I have, after years of experience, come to the sad conclusion that this is part of your character.  So do not expect an “it’s ok, don’t worry about it” text in response to your “apology” cause it ain’t coming, Jack.  I have no intention of soothing your conscience – or whatever it is you have that passes for one.

Second of all, it must be nice to sit up on your high horse and command. I would not know. I am a simple working mom who has been doing this for almost twenty years. Where would I possibly get the idea that I have experience and that I can do without your “advice?” By the way, advice is offered – and then usually only after requested. What you are doing is not giving advice, but attempting to dictate. Not the same thing there, Castro.  And, since it is not only unsolicited, but extremely BAD advice, I will not be taking it regardless of whether it makes you feel disrespected or not.  You have to be respectable to be respected, and I am sorry I am apparently the first one to inform you of this fact.

Thirdly, I am my own person. I do not respect your opinion or point of view. I am a self-determining individual who does things the best way she can and accepts the rewards or consequences of her choices. I have to. The fact that you are unable or unwilling to look at yourself through anything but rose-colored glasses is no longer my problem. You have issues. You know this. Not dealing with them is your own choice, so do not bitch and complain to me when your life continues on the same pathetic path it has been on since I’ve known you. You are a fool and I have no use for you.

Best wishes,

Originally Written May 26, 2010

  1. So, you know my brother-in-law?? I love your writing!

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